Theresa Santoro

I saw the glazed look come over their faces and I could see their peaked interest. I said "Gee, that looks like a good show. Maybe you can watch it Saturday while you are waiting for everyone to wake up". Four weeks ago, that would have been a great idea. Today, not so great. Four weeks into second and third grade and the opinions of peers have set in. Sabrina and Steven no longer have their own opinion.

"Moooooooooom! A show for toddlers? We can't watch that! We are way too old for that stuff! And so it begins the "extra kids that move into my house in elementary school. They are the invisible "everybody says" kids. All of those kids at school who now decide what is cool. The first friendships that now forms an absolute opinion. If "so and so" thinks it uncool, then so does everyone else.

So, I have the talk with Sabrina and Steven that I had with Ariana and Alexandra. No...not the sex talk! That talk is for next year.

Instead, I had the talk that says it is o.k. to like whatever you like. I tell them to remember that "you are special, just by being you". Sabrina is horrified to learn that some of her friends do not like Mr. Rogers. O.K., now these little school beasts have crossed the line! Mr. Rogers? What is not to like? Sabrina hesitates, and then explains that Mr. Rogers is for toddlers. I ask her how she explains my love of Mr. Rogers. She gives me that "I can't explain anything you do" look. I take the little person that was once so tiny into my lap and re-assure her that the man she thought would be the coolest Grandpa ever, and the man who she wept for when he died would always be o.k. to like. We reminisced about the shows they once loved and were now ready to leave behind. I explained that it was o.k. to walk away with fond memories.

I also let them in on a little secret...

I told them that their friends that are acting so bold probably miss some of their favorite toddler shows too! Although they are growing fast, I still see a little of the toddler when those big second and third graders come home. They want a cuddle.

This age is crucial to communication and trust. Sabrina and Steven made a passing comment, but it opened a conversation to answer questions that they had been pondering. The end result was that I am still there to hear their secrets and dreams. I am still there to share the memories of Mr. Rogers, and to catch him on PBS once in a while. Sesame Street and Mr. Rogers, and even the pesky Teletubbies. They are all the television friends we are ready to say goodbye to. The conversation was casual, and at the end of it they were armed with their self-esteem intact, and ready to take on the day. Peer pressures and all.

And as for me? I think I have a date with a Mr. Rogers episode. I hope we go on a great field trip with Mr. McFeely!

Happy Parenting!